Girl meets guy, they hit it off, amazing connection, the fireworks and chemistry are off the Richter scale…..
A few amazing dates pass and you think wow this could really go somewhere and then all of a sudden contact with Mr Wonderful seems to have come to a screeching halt.
One week you are in constant contact with phonecalls and texts and the next week he’s disappear quicker than a virgin on prom night.
Whats the story?! Are they playing games? Scared of being hurt emotionally? How can it be that this person who you have spent so much time with now feels like a complete stranger? So cold? The only contact you’re getting is a late night text asking if you fancy meeting up or bumping into each other in the local pub after a few too many?
What you feel may have been a start of a beautiful relationship forming for you is infact a situationship for them. In it for the short term, to get a quick fix, with no commitment and then they rush out whilst the bed sheets are still warm. They’re not interested in the romantic dates or getting to know you, they’ve already got you hooked. They only come back for more when it interests them and usually if they’re horny. Game over.
You end up clinging for whatever they can give you, a few crumbs of attention, surely one day you’ll get the whole loaf again like you did at the start right? Generally not……the hot and cold game is exactly that. A game.
The trick is to notice these signs early, listen to your gut instinct and get out of the game whilst you’re still winning.
I found myself in one of these ‘situationships’ where actually I thought it was a budding relationship……I remember this particular scenario so well. It was a Sunday eve, we had been at the local pub with our mutual friends and having a great time. I couldn’t find my phone so I asked my ‘boyfriend’ to call my phone so I could find it. His response? ‘I can’t call your phone as I never saved your number’.
Ouch. Was like taking a bullet. This was in front of all our friends who were equally as shocked. And it was also 4 months into our ‘situationship’. I got out pretty quickly after that. I realised that my self esteem meant far more to me than some useless tool that couldn’t even be arsed to save my number in his phone. Since when does saving a number mean you’re in it for life?!
That old cliche is springing in my mind : don’t hate the player, hate the game!
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